I still wonder about the wisdom of feeling like you need to tell everyone. I mean I do feel in some ways you are just asking to be labeled. I understand the need to tell close friends and those you want to seek out for support, but if this is beginning to sound like some people want to organize their own little gay pride parades within their wards.
At some point we are just going to have to admit that if we act on our urges it is a sin. Let me repeat it, acting on homosexuality is a sin. Accept it. No we aren't sinners for having those urges. But if we insist on clinging to the labels and demand to be respected for it I think its rather the same as those people who are demanding they be recognized for being gay and who feel its something to be have pride in.
Do people who struggle with other sins have pride in those struggles? No! I'm not saying we should think we a good or bad people because of it it, I'm just saying that we are people, like everyone else and its time we stop trying to let ourselves be defined by it. Are we going to live the rest of our lives allowing our struggles to be what defines our relationship with Heavenly Father? If we serve missions? If we get married? If we stay faithful to the church? And yes if we inhariet the Celestial Kingdom.
Should be stop talking about the evils of drinking because their are recovering alcoholics in the quorum? How about smoking or drug use? Maybe there is a closet chain smoker or pothead that we may offend. Should we not discuss the evils of porn because there are a few guys who are battling an addiction to it? Should we not discuss the evils of divorce because there is a member of the quorum who is going through one. Should we not talk about the evils of abortion and same gender marriage because it is viewed as a political topic and shouldn't be discussed in church because we may offend someone who tends to support the more liberal political parties? It is possible to become so over sensitized that any priesthood lesson on any topic will offend someone so perhaps we should just avoid church all together to avoid being offended.
And yes we do need to be more sensitive and more loving and more understanding. And we need to teach that we love the sinner not the sin, but as people grow and mature in the gospel so does their capacity for that. Sometimes what may come off as homophobia on the part of that sweet sister who says those insensitive words is just the by product of her trying to avoid something that is wicked and that at the same time she has had no real personal expirence with. Maybe she has only seen the stereotypes on TV who knows, she just knows that the Lord wants her to avoid it.
There are some people who no matter what won't understand. For whatever reason. I don't want to become the "gay member of the quorum" or every time a question about homosexuality arises I get called on. I also don't want to be the source of people not feeling like they can speak their minds or feel they have to treat me with kid gloves.
I think we need to enter into all things with wisdom. And no we can't let our fears guide us. But at the same time we need to use some common sense here. This is something that we do need to overcome and control or it can lead us to apostatize and leave the church. This isn't something we should have pride in. No its not something we should be ashamed of and if we have never acted out or if we have and have repented or even if we haven't but feel the urge to do so and are working to that its something we should be working to not let control us. Its something we should control. But its not who we are unless we let it be.