Monday, September 3, 2007

Attacks from other bloggers

Wow, I must have pecked at a nerve. An entire blog dedicated to me!!! And there isn't any references to Crow excrement. I compliment you.

And of course its an open invitations for everyone else to add their pot shots. To attack the intolerant, to belittle the zealot with their smug sarcastic and enlightened statements that aren't clouded by the repressive influences of the church. So now that we are all in our respective corners with our dander up and ready to attack how should we proceed?

I love the way Zeal for the gospel is now a bad thing. And defending things that the church says will prevent us from progressing is now en vogue.

Okay, first of all. I'm really not sure why there is dissent. The church isn't forcing anyone to stick around if they don't want to. No one if forcing anyone to believe anything. That's why its called faith. That's why we need to use our agency to make a choice. We aren't hear following Saten's plan. Yes, if you want to be faithful to the church you do need "to be of one heart and one voice." Yes, it is possible to do this and retain your own sense of individuality.

That is what agency is all about. If you disagree or feel something is wrong, then please by all means develop a backbone and follow through with your beliefs. Stop wallowing in self loathing. If you choose to leave the church, that's your choice and we need to respect it, love you and accept you.

Of course those of us who do have testimonies will think you are making a eternally devastating mistake. If we love you and also believe in the church we would of course feel that way. Oh perhaps you need to walk way and lose it in order to realize what you do have and desire to get it back. Who knows. We don't receive revelation for you, your the only one that can do that. All I can do is pray for you and hold to what we believe is the gospel.

But please have respect for those of us who do want to stay and remain faithful and and leave the church alone.

Its ironic that the same person who who accuses me of "preaching" items that are not official stances of the church is the same person who rejected my friendship after I offered what I thought was a heartfelt and public apology and is now using my blogs or at least thats the implication in his comment here as one of his excuses to "go elsewhere." I really would like someone to clue me in what apostate doctrine I'm exposing. What untruths am I guilty of spreading.

Bloggers here can bash the prophet and his appearance on Larry King and other interview and attack leaders like Elder Bateman for his statements. They can tear apart and parody the Elder Oak's and Wickman Interview. They can offer their version of what the Church should say in their opinion since they seem to think they now receive inspirations to lead the church and guide those to go against those called to be Prophet, Seers and Revalators.

They can come right out and say that church leaders are wrong and then they can go off and say I'm somehow intolerant and closed minded because I have the nerve to stand up for things that I do consider sacred and that I clearly remember making a covenant not to be part of "evil speaking of the Lord's anointed" and to stand up for the church when I encounter this. I'm a bad person for sticking to what I said I would do.

I've been told if you don't like what I've blogged don't read it. Well what's the point? Do you only blog so that those who agree with you can back you up? Are you saying you don't want dissent? Are you saying you want to crush anyone who has an opinion that goes against yours?

I posted today why I had taken a step back. Why I had stopped reading these blogs. I felt that was a peace offering and a move towards more tolerance on both parts. But apparently that's not how bloggers play. Today I let curiosity get the best of me and I returned. And what do I find and entire attack based on me. All I can say is wow, I'm flattered that I've had this kind of effect on everyone. I am sorry that the attacks have to continue. I guess being Christlike in the Moho community is another word for conditional love and acceptance.

I have found those who demand tolerance don't normally understand what it is to be tolerant. In fact they are normally the least tolerant ones out there. It's there way or no way, it's black and white. You are either with us or you're not. You don't have a right to an opinion if you disagree with us its because you are a ignorant bigot. Ironicly isn't that sorta what I'm accused of here? Seeing things as black and white?

If they can't debate in a civil and respectful way, they resort to petty insults and attacks. If they can't argue against the message their next move is to belittle the messenger. If they can make that person message appear tactless and simple-minded they can win by default or at least feel smug in that they have been attacked.

I'm sorry if I mistakenly believed that it was somehow admirable to stay faithful to the church. That my CTR ring meant choose the right. Apparently it means Choose the relative.

If I'm standing for what I believe, I honestly don't care if you tolerate or not tolerate me. Because I know whom I'm standing up for. If I'm bad for believing that I'm right then I suppose anyone who argues with me is also guilty of the same offense. I only worry about one judge.

I've heard so many people blog about being tolerant and Christlike. But apparently thats only reserved for those who go along with what is the group think here. Again more of what I'm being accused of.

That's one thing you can't accuse me of. I may disagree with you but I'd never openly attack you. I may defend myself as any human would who is attacked. I may disagree with you and tell you why. If you want to take it as an attack that's your issue. But I also would rather us work it out and be friends then continue to take pot shots at each other.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

His work and His Glory and My apology

I started blogging think it would be a good outlet for myself to express myself. Then I started venturing into other blogs, mostly those in the Northern Lights site. After a while I was finding it wasn't having a positive effect on me and all I was doing was contending and defending the faith so to speak against people who I would probably otherwise really like but who are struggling to find a way to be faithful and still feel they are themselves. What I'm posting today is mostly a letter in response to a friend who wrote a letter to leave the church after years of struggling.

I have stepped back a few weeks and not posted anything because to be honest I don't think contending with varying opinions what is true and what is false in regards to the gospel isn't helping any one, and if anything is only frustrating and causing further contention. I wasn't feeling the spirit, in fact I was just amazed how many people thought so many different things about something that we do have a clear standard of truth about.

My friend wrote:

....that my desire in life is not to gain the greatest blessing, but to serve God with all my heart, might, mind, and strength.....

I think what would make God the most happy and would lead to his own complete happiness is knowing that all his children want and accepts the greatest blessings that he has to offer, the way a parent wants their children to gain those things. Nothing I think causes him greater grief then when one of his children rejects his gifts.

His work and his Glory is to bring to pass the exhalation and eternal life of men. We say he's perfect in that he is complete, but I wonder if he ever will be completely until he has finished "His work and His glory."

I don't dispute personal revelation but i still maintain it is given to help us find our own individual way of gaining this glory that is his work.

And perhaps maybe some of us won't get married or be attracted to girls in this life. But is it worth canceling our blessing and our sealings to your parents and throwing away everything because we feel we can't accept a part of it. Our leaders are just teaching what they have been inspired to teach about what is "His work and His Glory."

Yes find other ways to serve him. Be faithful, do your best. Be open to change if it is to happen. Change isn't bad. Its how we grow. But I do know that we will be blessed as much for our effort as we are for our accomplishment. In the temple we are endowed that through our faithfulness we will be MADE worthy. Not by anything we can do alone. Like the atonement, we can't do it alone.

Last week we studied in Sunday school the Athens and how the philosophers spent their time in nothing else, but either to tell, or to hear some new thing. (Acts 17:21) They turned to logic and what made sense to them. What they lost was the fact that they were "the offspring of God" and that as children of God their roles are the same as God. Paul taught them that when we understand God's nature we understand our own. Paul didn't try to reason with them, he just bore a powerful testimony of the Love of God. They felt it and while it didn't make sense or was logical, they felt it inside and were converted.

Just stay close to what you can. Be faithful to what you can. You don't have to go all or nothing now.

I know that for those of us struggling this is a lot like what Abraham had to endure when he was asked to offer up Issac. We are being ask to give something up that we feel is part of us, that we do love that we do feel is real. But I do have faith that if we do take our Issac's up to the alter that the Lord will provide us a lamb. Is it cruel of the Lord to test us this way? Well when compared to what he wants to reward us with maybe he has to in order to see if we are strong enough for what he wants to give us. Maybe thats the real reason we are being tested.

I'm sorry if I've ever said anything that upset you or anyone else here. I only did so in love and not to contend with you. I hope you understand that. If I really didn't care or thought you were pointless or not worthy of friendship I would have walked away. I know you are just trying to make since of something that doesn't make sense. I know cause I've been there to.

Sometimes I think we don't write what we want. We write what we feel and instead of reacting we need to listen. We need to listen between the lines and not react to the words. We need to react to the feeling and not to the thoughts. Sometimes we lash out when we are hurt and sometimes we do just need to love.

Sometimes its not a matter of being right or wrong. Its a matter of feeling loved and accepted. And loving and accepting those who do struggle with one thing or another. As a church and people I think we need to work on the second part of that much much more.