Monday, February 18, 2008

Modar

I shared this with a friend in his blog, but I wanted to share it here because I know it fits.

I don't know why we are attracted to some people and not others. I found when I was on my mission that I was prompted to talk to some people more then others. I also know there have been times when I feel the Lord knows I'm stuburn and uses my struggle as a means to direct me to people who I need to know. I don't know. I guess if I keep close to the Spirit and pray for guidance that I can't really go wrong if I'm suddenly "attracted to someone." If my intentions are pure and I am trying to do whats right I can't go wrong.

However I do know that God won't use bad things to inspire us or put us into situations where we could fall in order to save another person. He loves us all equally. We know our own strengths and weaknesses and should challenge them. But I also know he does sometimes send angels in the form of regular everyday heroes.

I went to a party once with a friend. while I was there a lot of stuff started to happen that was really wrong. First someone put on a movie that was bad and then some of the people begin to pair off and make out yes there were a lot of gay people there and whatnot. I felt uncomfortable. I didn't want to leave because I didn't want to offend my friend, but at the same time I really didn't want to be there.

There was this one guy who I had been watching all night who didn't look like he fit in. He had come with a group of girls and was sitting in the corner of the room. I kept looking at him and noticed that he was at times looking at me. And yes he was attractive. And yes I was drawn to him. But I resisted that urge.

So I went out on the balcony. While I was there the guy followed me out.

He said "hey I noticed you seemed uncomfortable in there," I nodded, it was cold. We were both shivering and you could see our breath.

He said "so did I, I don't know any of those people and thats not really what I believe." He then said "I've been watching you all night and I was wondering why someone like you were here." I told him it was funny because I thought the same thing.

I said I was there because my friend had been in the cast of the play and I was his ride and I was supporting him.

We talked some more and he asked me outright "Are you gay?" I didn't think about it and said, "No I'm Mormon."

He looked stunned and said, "OMG so am I."

I think we both thought the same thing right then because while we both smiled at each other we stood out there in the cold for a few minutes not saying anything.

We both realized that it wasn't so much attraction that made us single each other out. It was that we both had "Modar" that "Mormon Glow" so-to-speak. He said he hadn't been to church since he moved out here but that he missed it. He said he still read the scriptures his mom gave him. He said he had done stuff and felt that he wouldn't be accepted, but that he had prayed every night and hoped to find a friend who would understand.

Yes we do stand out even when we may want to blend in. When we start not to thats when we need to really think about if we are on the right path.

We stayed friends, he moved back to where he was from a few months later. But that night we both probably saved each other from making some stupid mistakes.

I've had this expirence a number of times since than and I think it's proof that the Lord does watch out for us when we let him and sometimes when we don't think he's watching.

2 comments:

Potentate said...

I enjoyed the story. Thanks.

Forester said...

I agree that we are often placed in certain situations where we can help. I met a guy while I was out "looking" for something that I shouldn't have been looking for. Instead of finding what I wanted, God led me to someone who needed my help as much as I needed his. For some reason, I've never had the real opportunity to have a gay relationship, whether brief or lasting. I feel God is watching out for me, even when I'm not pursuing His purposes.